The Magi 3: Revenge of the Myths
by Deliverer
Summary: The clown apocalypse is over, thankfully. Poopatine's problems are just beginning though. Sigmund and Kyle have decided to be rebellious. He has never had patience for rebellion. On top of it Dr. Acula is plotting something sinister and Poopatine knows it involves him and the boys. Not only that but Sigmund has a loose tooth he's hiding. Wizard Tooth Fairy, anyone? What now Janitor
1. Dr Acula Returns

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Preceded by _Fanboy and ChumChum: Attack of the Clowns_ and that stories predecessor and original, _Fanboy and ChumChum: The Phantom Mage_. Been a while since I posted something in this category, yet I have this story done as well as another one. I might as well get things rolling again. Enjoy.)

Dr. Acula's Return

"Sigmund, Kyle!" Poopatine furiously bellowed, pounding on the door of the study.

"Vhat?" Sigmund shot in annoyance, calling from inside as he was working on a potion with Kyle.

"Can't this wait?" Kyle, ticked off at the interruption, replied, throwing in another ingredient.

"Unlock this door immediately or so help me I'll take off the whole door!" Poopatine shouted angrily.

"Hah!" Sigmund shot.

"You wouldn't dare!" Kyle barked.

Poopatine gaped then scowled. Turning, he called, "Brenda, bring me my tools!"

The two boys froze then whipped their heads around to the door. "You can't be serious!" Sigmund shot.

"Watch me!" Poopatine shot.

"All right already, we'll open it!" Kyle barked. "Hide the potion, quick. Janitor Poopatine would never let us finish this. It's just that dangerous," he warned Sigmund

Sigmund zapped the potion, commanding the ingredients to hide on the shelf as Kyle went to the door. Sigmund quickly replaced the current cauldron with another less lethal one. Kyle opened the door with an angry and annoyed glare. "Vhat do you vant?" Sigmund questioned from behind Kyle, turning and racing to the door as well.

FBaCC

"What were you two doing in here?" Poopatine demanded.

"Vhat does it look like 'fazher?'" Sigmund sneered.

"Don't _take_ that tone with me young man," Poopatine warned.

"We're concocting a potion," Kyle said.

"Fine, then why the secrecy?" Poopatine demanded.

"Because it was none of your business," Kyle replied.

"You two are fast running out of strikes," Poopatine warned. They harrumphed, sulkily folding their arms. "Now, what happened to the living room?!" The two blinked and looked passed him into said room which was in shambles, goop dripping from the roof. "I'm gone half an hour and this place looks like a nuclear war zone!" Poopatine shot.

"Oh, that? Why that was, um…" Kyle began. "Sigmund can explain!"

"I vhat?" Sigmund asked. Seeing Poopatine's glare he cringed then grinned innocently, saying, "Potion gone wrong?"

"_That's_ an _understatement_," Poopatine stated. "Which potion? I'm very sure 'How to Heal Tapeworm' is not a highly explosive experiment."

Sigmund and Kyle blinked and exchanged looks then innocently grinned at the janitor. "Ve attempted to, um… make firevorks?" he lied.

"Well now you two can attempt to clean it up!" Poopatine ordered.

"But that's not fair!" Kyle exclaimed.

"You made the mess, you clean it," Poopatine shot. "Get started. You have talents. Use them."

"You're ze janitor," Sigmund argued.

"I'm not cleaning up after you two," Poopatine shot. The two glared viciously at him and walked passed moodily. Poopatine watched after them and muttered, "Rebellious little preteen brats. Hah! Think they know it all. I dread to see what they're like as teenagers."

FBaCC

Sulking, the two boys made the cleaning supplies dance around the room cleaning up. Poopatine watched, arms folded. Finally the place was sparkling and the two boys glared at him angrily. "There, much better," Poopatine complimented.

"Can ve go back to our potion now?" Sigmund asked.

"You two have been holed up in there for hours. Go outside for a bit," Poopatine said.

"There's nothing to do outside," Kyle complained. Sigmund nodded in agreement.

"Go hang out with your friends," Poopatine said.

"Fanboy and Chum Chum are probably in the middle of messing something up," Kyle answered.

"Und Michael und Duke are being forced into tutoring," Sigmund added.

"You have one more hour in that study boys, then after lunch you're going out whether you like it or not," Poopatine declared.

"Dankeshan fazher!" Sigmund said, smiling.

"Thank you papa," Kyle added with a grin. Instantly the two raced off. Poopatine shook his head after them.

Brenda booped. Poopatine looked at her and said, "You don't know the _half_ of it. You're lucky I built you without a sleep function. I _wish_ I were as lucky. Who knew children could be so much work?" Shaking his head he went with Brenda into the kitchen.

FBaCC

The hour was almost up when the explosion came, shaking the house. Poopatine cried out in alarm, falling to the ground. "What on Earth!?" he demanded, scrambling back up. He ran out of the kitchen towards the study. "Kyle, Sigmund!" he called.

The study door opened and Kyle crawled out, coughing and slightly singed. "Ow," he moaned.

"I told you I vould not put up ein protection spell far you," Sigmund answered walking out. The shield he was behind was black. He snapped his fingers and Poopatine saw the boy himself was unscathed, thankfully. "Vell, at least you had ze brains to stand behind me."

"You're a big stupid jerk Sigmund!" Kyle yelled at him, barely managing to stagger up and put out a lick of flame on his hair. He was black with soot, though, and his voice sounded scratchy like he'd inhaled too much smoke.

"Sticks und stones, Kyle," Sigmund replied, casually waving his hand. Seeing Poopatine's furious expression, however, the two fell silent and shrunk away slightly, huddling close together.

"I take it the Tapeworm potion didn't pan out?" Poopatine growled lowly.

"Um, misread?" Kyle questioned. Poopatine stormed angrily by them and looked into the remnants of the cauldron. He sniffed and wrinkled his nose in disgust. He saw a spell on the table and picked it up, reading. Silently the two children tried to sneak away.

FBaCC

"Boys!" Poopatine furiously yelled.

"Um, ve're going outside now!" Sigmund exclaimed. The two tried to bolt, but just then Brenda appeared, grabbing them both. "Mozher, let go!" Sigmund pled. Brenda ignored, bringing them to Poopatine. The two swallowed and gazed up at him wide eyed.

"You two won't be going anywhere for a while," Poopatine growled darkly. "You're grounded for two weeks!"

"Two weeks?! Surely you're not serious!" Kyle protested.

"Oh I'm very serious," Poopatine replied. "What were you two thinking? I strictly forbid you from trying any spells from the back of the book. These are far above either of your skill levels!"

"Well how are we supposed to learn them if we can't practice them?" Kyle demanded.

"By building up to them!" Poopatine shot. "You two could have been killed!"

"Vell ve veren't," Sigmund retorted.

"It doesn't matter!" Poopatine barked. "Grounded! No spells, no visitors, no slumber parties, nothing! You will stay in this house, in your rooms, for the full two weeks!

"Ve can't stay in our rooms!" Sigmund argued.

"When I'm at home you will. If I'm gone you can come out, but you're not leaving the house!" Poopatine yelled.

"You have no right…" Kyle began.

"I have every right," Poopatine retorted. The two boys fell quiet, angry. They weren't getting out of this one. The janitor didn't make idle threats. He followed through every time. They'd learned _that_ quickly enough. Sulking and muttering under their breath, the two boys walked into their rooms and slammed the doors. Poopatine shook his head in annoyance. Brenda began to massage his shoulders. He sighed and sat in her gratefully.

FBaCC

He was almost asleep when the phone rang. He opened his eyes, annoyed. He thought of calling to one of the boys to pick it up, but in the rebellious state they were in they'd probably turn their grounding around on him. He knew _he_ would. He grabbed the phone and asked, annoyed, "Hello?"

"Mr. Poopatine, hello," a heavily accented voice replied.

"Dr. Acula?" Poopatine questioned, slightly surprised the doctor would be calling him.

"I vas just vundering. Do you have a book of natural remedies in your humble estate?" the doctor replied.

"Yes?" Poopatine cautiously replied, raising a suspicious eyebrow.

"Excellent. I vill be over tonight to collect it," the doctor declared.

"Now wait a…" Poopatine began.

"Goodbye," Acula stated, hanging up before Poopatine could protest. Poopatine blinked at the phone. Strange. What was with the sudden visit being planned? And why had the man sounded slightly desperate? You'd think he was dying of thirst or something. His voice had been hoarse as well. He cringed. Why did he feel as if the boys shouldn't be here when he came? Perhaps just this once he would alleviate the rules and let them go.

FBaCC

"Boy's, come here!" he called.

Sulkily Kyle opened the door, glaring at him. "I can't come out, remember!" Sigmund called from the other room.

"Either you come out on your own or I'll _help_ you come out!" Poopatine retorted. Kyle was in front of him in an instant. "One, two…" Poopatine began. Sigmund suddenly appeared, scowling viciously.

"You vouldn't have dared!" Sigmund shot.

"I don't make idle threats," Poopatine replied. "Boys, I've thought about it and have decided to give you one more chance. I'm lifting your grounding. You're free to go. However, no potions for the rest of today or tomorrow."

They exchanged looks, wanting to argue, but they'd just been given a once in a blue moon opportunity here. Would they really dare waste it? Finally they looked back at Poopatine and replied, "Yes sir."

"Good. Run along. Dr. Acula's coming over tonight. I would prefer it if you weren't around when he came," Poopatine dismissed, waving his hand.

"Vhy?" Sigmund asked.

"Just a feeling," Poopatine replied. "Go on you two."

"All right papa!" Kyle cheered. The two instantly bolted, rushing outside. Good. Hopefully they'd still be gone when the doctor came around. He didn't trust the man, and if something was wrong, he wouldn't have his boys around to share in whatever fate Acula had planned.


	2. I Vant To Suck Your Blood

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Trying to get more of the Bram Stoker feeling in Dr. Acula.)

I Vant To Suck Your Blood

"Man, I just got my wisdom teeth pulled. It hurt like you wouldn't believe," Duke declared as he, Michael, and Sigmund sat in the park eating. "I couldn't eat anything but liquids, soup, and ice-cream forever."

"I've only lost five baby teeth. I'm glad I haven't grown wisdom teeth yet," Michael remarked. "How many have _you_ lost Sigmund?"

Sigmund, about to bite into a sandwich, paused and looked at them. Bringing it away he shifted awkwardly and cleared his throat, saying, "Um, vell, I have not lost ein tooth yet."

"Really? Aren't you like twelve?" Duke asked.

"Sorcerer's do not lose teeth like normal!" Sigmund defended. "Kyle has not lost vun yet eizher. Zank _goodness_ ve do not loose teeth like you."

"Why?" Michael asked incredulously.

"Because our vizard tooth fairy iz not ze tooth fairy _you_ are used to," Sigmund answered. "He iz ein evil entity who lives on Tooth Mountain. Vhen a vizard or sorcerer loses teeth, he comes und takes every ozher tooth you have out vith his own hands vun by painful vun until your mouth iz nussink but ein empty black hole. Zere iz ein spell you can use to help vard him off, but most can't be bothered learning it until it iz absolutely necessary," Sigmund answered.

"Dude…" Duke began.

"That's just creepy man," Michael added. Sigmund shrugged casually. He bit the sandwich and yelped in pain.

"What's up?" Duke questioned. Sigmund gasped and reached for the tooth that had screamed in protest. He wiggled it nervously. It moved! He gasped.

"I-I have ein loose tooth…" he squeaked.

"Oh man, that ain't good," Michael remarked. Sigmund, now pale, put down the sandwich blankly. Oh, he didn't know the _half_ of it.

FBaCC

"Fanboy, Chum Chum, where are you two?" Kyle demanded, knocking on their door in annoyance. He couldn't believe he'd actually become desperate enough to actually seek these two out of his own accord.

"Hey Kyle!" he heard a voice exclaim from behind. Fanboy's. He cried out in alarm, jumping and whirling. There, dangling from the roof tied together, were Fanboy and Chum Chum!

"What are you two ninnies doing?" Kyle demanded.

"Just hanging around," Chum Chum replied.

"Hah, hah, very funny," Kyle said. He zapped them with his wand and they fell to the ground with cries of pain. Quickly they scrambled up.

"Whew, thanks," Fanboy said.

"Hey Kyle, let's play!" Chum Chum exclaimed.

"Play _what_?" Kyle questioned.

"Shenanigans!" the two exclaimed together. Kyle sighed drearily. He supposed he deserved whatever came to him from this point on.

FBaCC

The doorbell rang. Curiously Poopatine looked at the door. Oh yes, Dr. Acula was coming over. He frowned. He didn't like it, but he supposed he had no choice. With an annoyed sigh he put down the book he was reading and opened the door for the Doctor. "Dr. Acula, welcome," Janitor Poopatine greeted.

"Yes, velcome. Thank you very muchly Mr. Poopatine," Dr. Acula replied. Poopatine blinked at him. Was it his imagination, or did the man's eyes have a tinge of red in them? And did he look older or just desperate; or both?

"Dr. Acula, I must admit I was surprised at your sudden inquiry to visit this lovely evening," Poopatine remarked, pouring tea and offering it to the man, watching him suspiciously. The man took it, but didn't look too impressed. In fact, he was beginning to fidget uncomfortably.

"Yes, vell, I had some… things, I needed to do vith you," the man replied. "Vhere are your sons, Mr. Poopatine? I vould like to do a checkup on them."

"Oh," Poopatine pressed, disliking the way he'd said it. He turned to scan the bookshelf. "They're gone for the evening, out with friends. You know how preteens are. You said you wanted a certain natural remedy book."

"Most definitely," Dr. Acula verified, rising as the man's back was turned and slowly advancing towards him. "I suppose I vill have to make do vith _you_. I feel I von't be disappointed. Tell me, Mr. Poopatine, do you ever remove your hood?"

"No. Rarely. And it's Janitor Poopatine to you," Poopatine simply answered, unaware of the advancing predator behind him. All at once a tingling went up the back of his spine, though, and he turned. The man was only feet from him! He blinked then frowned, asking, "Can I help you?"

"Curious, is all," Dr. Acula suavely replied. Suave? Since when did the man have finesse? Poopatine glared at him, trying to read him, but he got nothing. Soon enough he shrugged and turned away again. Why didn't he feel like it was a good idea to turn his back on the Doctor? Dr. Acula. Odd name, really. And what was with the eyes? They were red now, no doubt. He scanned the bookshelf then froze as his eyes fell on a certain book title; _Dracula_. He blinked and rubbed his eyes, gasping. Dr. Acula, Dracula.

FBaCC

"Dude, what are you gonna do about the loose tooth?" Duke questioned.

"Nussink! I just vill not eat," Sigmund replied.

"Yeah, like that's gonna work," Michael remarked. "Ain't you gonna tell your dad?"

"Nein! It iz none uf his concern," Sigmund answered. "He vould probably pull it."

"He might know how to fix it, though," Duke offered.

"Unlikely," Sigmund replied as they walked into Oz's Comics.

FBaCC

"So who's your doctor, Kyle?" Chum Chum asked as the three played some questioning game Fanboy and Chum Chum had come up with. From what he could tell it was a mix between Truth or Dare and Twenty Questions. One person asked twenty questions, you had no choice but to answer them and truthfully. You lied, the lie detecting slapper thing Fanboy had invented slapped you harder than you would think it could. He'd learned the hard way. Lucky for him, neither of his ninnies were good at asking questions.

"Oh some strange old chap named Dr. Acula or something like that," Kyle answered.

Fanboy gasped and exclaimed, "Dr. Acula!? You mean that great doctor who gave Chum Chum a longer neck so we could stay immortal together forever? Not that it worked, but still!"

Kyle started then looked at them in shock. After a moment he asked, "Neck surgery?"

"Uh huh," the two verified.

"Dr. Acula, neck, Dr Acula, Dracula…" Kyle mused. He gasped, paling, and exclaimed, "Vampire! Dr. Acula is a vampire! I _knew_ something was off about him, I just _knew_ it! Oh no, he's at my house with daddy Poopatine! I have to go!" With that he zoomed off.

"Daddy Poopatine?" Fanboy asked. Chum Chum shrugged.

FBaCC

Kyle conjured up a broomstick and leapt on, zooming off. He grabbed out his crystal ball and waved his hand over it, summoning his 'sibling.' "You have reached Sigmund ze Sorcerer," Sigmund answered, looking bored. Behind him were Duke and Michael looking awed.

"Sigmund, papa's in danger! Dr. Acula is secretly a vampire!" Kyle exclaimed.

"…Vat?" Sigmund incredulously replied, seriously doubting his brother's sanity. Duke and Michael exchanged incredulous looks.

"Dr. Acula, Dracula! That's why he wanted us out of the house, he sensed something was wrong! Meet me at home!" Kyle ordered. Sigmund became alarmed, catching instantly on, then snapped his fingers and suddenly appeared in front of Kyle on the broom, leaving Duke and Michael gaping in shock and wondering what had just happened. Kyle found himself holding onto Sigmund and blinking blankly at the sudden appearance. "Why didn't you just snap home?" Kyle questioned.

"Because you vould take forever to get zere. You are so slow und pathetic on ein broom it iz sad. It vould be January befar you got zhere. I am so much better zen you at zis it iz not even debateable," Sigmund answered. With that the broom shot off.

Kyle screamed in terror and clung to Sigmund tightly, shrieking, "Slow down! Whatever are you trying to do, _kill_ us?!" Sigmund grinned excitedly, zooming in and out of hairpin turns and dodging nearly impossible obstacles while humming a tune and smirking inwardly at his baby brother's panic. He loved every minute of this. All at once home was in view and the two gritted their teeth. Sigmund parked right by the door and the two leapt off. Kyle looked around, then satisfied they were alive he remarked, "Wow, record timing."

"Uf course," Sigmund boasted. "Come on! Fazher iz in danger!" With that the two children burst through the door and charged through the house in order to get to their dad.

FBaCC

"Uncanny," Poopatine remarked.

"Vhat is?" the man behind him questioned, and Poopatine stiffened on feeling the breath on the back of his neck.

He was silent a moment, frozen, then replied, "Your name. Take out the period after the abbreviation and you get Dracula."

"Really?" the man hissed, literally hissed, and Poopatine instantly knew what he was speaking to. He gasped and spun. Mistake. That left his neck open, and the man lunged with a shriek. Poopatine cried out in terror and caught the Doctor, barely managing to fend off the blow and throw him to the ground. Dr. Acula wouldn't let go, however, and the two rolled across the ground, Acula trying to get at his neck, Poopatine more terrified than he ever remembered _being_.

"Help!" he cried.

FBaCC

"Zat vas fazher!" Sigmund exclaimed.

"Hold on papa, we're coming!" Kyle cried. Poopatine heard the voices and gasped, sharply looking back at the door. The man lunged again, but Poopatine managed to dodge the fangs.

"Boys, don't!" he called. Too late. All at once the door flew open and Dr. Acula was sent flying off of him with a pained shriek as two balls of fire, one blue and one red, struck him viciously. Poopatine gasped and sat quickly up, scrambling away. Kyle and Sigmund raced to him and grabbed his arms, pulling him up.

"Let's get out of here!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Ve cannot be bozhered vith him," Sigmund agreed.

"My thoughts exactly," Poopatine said as he clambered onto Brenda. The robotic chair seized the two children in its robotic hands and they all headed for the door desperately.

Just then Dr. Acula sprang in front of them and attacked, knocking the boys both from the chair! Poopatine gasped. Brenda instantly stopped. Poopatine leapt off and raced towards the vampire who was trying to bite one of the two tender young necks beneath him. "Zurrender," Acula hissed.

"Get away from them!" Poopatine shot, tackling the doctor from the two boys. The two rolled across the floor before Poopatine finally managed to slam Acula into the table leg. He leapt up and ran for his children.

"Garlic, we need garlic!" Kyle exclaimed. Sigmund snapped his fingers, poofing some up, and tossed a few heads to Kyle. Acula leapt up, diving for Poopatine, but just then Kyle and Sigmund tossed the garlic. The vampire screamed in pain and alarm as the cloves hit him.

"Bullseye!" Sigmund cheered. The two high fived

"Brenda, a wooden stake would be nice!" Poopatine shot. Brenda beeped and whistled, pulling out a gardening stake. Poopatine grabbed it as she threw it to him and blinked blankly. Well, he supposed it was the best they could do. He instantly turned around, stake ready to plunge into Acula's heart, but Dr. Acula spotted the threat and gasped. With a scream he transformed into a bat and flew quickly out the window.

FBaCC

The three's hearts were pounding as they looked blankly out the window after the retreating figure. Finally Poopatine sighed in relief, lowering the stake. He cried out in alarm the next minute, though, as the children tackled him to the ground hugging him. "You're all right!" Kyle exclaimed.

"I can't believe ve vere being treated by a vampire!" Sigmund exclaimed. "I zought ve vould lose you fazher."

"There, there?" Poopatine more asked than anything, patting the boys' backs. "Now kindly get off of me!" Quickly the two climbed off. Poopatine harrumphed and rose up. "I'm fine boys. Thank you for the rescue. I believe I told you to stay away, though."

"Well we couldn't just let him make you into a snack," Kyle defended. Pooptine chuckled and ruffled their hair, walking passed.

"Does this mean we can practice bigger potions now?" Kyle called after him.

"Dream on," Poopatine replied.

"Vhat about spells?" Sigmund questioned, not honestly expecting a positive answer. To his surprise, however, Poopatine paused. The duo's eyes widened. Was he actually going to _let_ them?

After a moment Poopatine turned and replied, "Perhaps."

"No way," they said in shock as the man walked into the kitchen.


	3. Tooth Fairy

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Sorry for the wait. Been distracted lately. Remember, they're still faking being family.)

Tooth Fairy

The two were screaming and shouting bloody murder at each other. Poopatine was watching in shock and disbelief. This was getting ridiculous. One day and this was the fifth time he'd had to deal with this! He must be doing _something_ wrong. He shook his head then yelled, "Sigmund and Kyle Bloodworth Thomason!" Brenda's claws shot out and she caught them both, tearing them from each other. They continued to shout at each other, then in protest to her, then back at each other. "Enough!" Poopatine roared.

The two boys froze, shocked at the outburst. All at once they shouted together, "He started it!"

"Unbelievable. I don't care who started it! This is literally the thousandth time I've had to pry you two apart since the start of this whole ordeal! I've _counted_! Stop it, the both of you!" Poopatine yelled. The two sulked, saying nothing. "Now I have some errands to run. Please boys, try not to kill each other while I'm gone!" Poopatine shot in annoyance. "And if I hear anything or suspect anything happened, you two will suffer immeasurably." He grabbed the basket of pillows and laundry. They grumbled an incoherent reply and Poopatine left. The two stuck their tongues out at each other then walked into their own rooms

FBaCC

Sigmund wiggled the tooth uncertainly. It was getting looser and looser. Perhaps he _should_ have told Poopatine about it. He hoped father would return soon so he could do just that. He was slightly afraid. "Sigmund, where are you? What are you doing?" Kyle called. Sigmund quickly stopped wiggling as Kyle entered his room.

"Vhat?" Sigmund asked. "I'm doing nussing."

"I'm sure you aren't," Kyle doubtfully said. If he knew one thing about the sorcerer, it was that he was never up to nothing. "Come out for lunch. Dad left us homemade macaroni and smoothies," Kyle said.

Sigmund's eyes widened and he exclaimed a little too quickly, "I am not hungry!"

Kyle started. Sigmund _never_ passed up good food. He was a bit of a connoisseur, in that regard, albeit the meal was fairly plain. "You're joking," Kyle said.

Sigmund blinked then replied, innocently grinning, "Uf course. Let's go."

FBaCC

Kyle watched Sigmund curiously as Sigmund stared helplessly at the food. Okay, he was definitely hiding something. "Well…" Kyle fished.

"Vould you believe I do not like it?" Sigmund asked lamely. As if. Kyle knew he was impressed with their father's cooking. Sigmund hadn't expected much of the crusty old bachelor.

"Um, no," Kyle answered. It was then that he noticed Sigmund subconsciously begin to wiggle a tooth, and his eyes widened. "Oh my gosh; you have a loose tooth!"

"Nein!" Sigmund insisted.

"Oh please, I know a loose tooth when I see it!" Kyle shot.

"You vouldn't know ein _spell_ if it hit you un ze nose, let alone vhat ein loose tooth looks like!" Sigmund insulted.

Kyle gasped then exclaimed, "How dare you!? Perhaps I should help it along the rest of the way!"

"As if. You vouldn't have ze strength to pluck ze vings off of a fly far ein potion," Sigmund said in a snarky tone.

"Says Sigmund the Stupid Show-off?" Kyle yelled. Furious with each other now, they each took large bites out of their food. Mistake. Sigmund yowled in pain, covering his mouth. Kyle gasped. All at once the tooth wiggled on its own! "Oh heavens, not again!" Kyle cried in alarm. He knew the wizard tooth fairy still had it in for him. Just then the tooth fell into Sigmund's hand!

FBaCC

The two paled, screaming. "Ze vizard tooth fairy!" Sigmund exclaimed.

"Quickly, three step charm!" Kyle exclaimed. Sigmund started. Kyle knew a spell for warding off the wizard _tooth fairy_? Impossible! How unless… Unless he'd almost lost a tooth before. Of _course_! He wished he'd been there to see it. "Sprinkle anti-fairy dust in a circle!" Kyle ordered.

"Fairy be gone, fairy be gone, fairy be gone," Sigmund chanted, quickly grabbing out a pouch and sprinkling it.

"Knock three times!" Kyle ordered.

Sigmund quickly obeyed, but he only got to two before pausing and saying, "Vait a minute. Vhy am I following _vizard_ spells? I am ein sorcerer! I can take it."

"Sigmund, don't stop now! You don't know what he's like!" Kyle fearfully exclaimed. "This is the only way! Keep going!" There was no time to argue with each other! Alarmed, Sigmund instantly obeyed. He knew that, while sorcerer's had a natural knack for magic, wizard's usually studied extensively. Kyle was no exception. He had promise, but right now he was too young. He was one heck of a studier though, and if he said it was the only way, even for a sorcerer, Sigmund believed him. He quickly finished the third knock, but right then the door was kicked in! The two gasped and whirled only to face the tooth fairy!

Kyle gritted his teeth and raised his hands, saying, "I summon all pillows from bed, bath, and beyond!" No response. He gasped and paled. "Where are all my pillows!?"

"Fazher took zem to be cleaned," Sigmund realized in horror.

"Oh poo," Kyle groaned. The two stared in horror as the wizard tooth fairy laughed coldly and advanced. The two brothers backed away in terror.

"I was wonderin' when you'd get me back, mates. Now I 'ave my answer," the tooth fairy menacingly said.

"Oh zoot," Sigmund groaned.

"So, which one of you is it? Eh it don't matter. I remember you, boy. You owe me your teeth," the fairy said, pointing at Kyle. He noticed Sigmund's gap and grinned. "Oh, the other one too. Looks like I've hit jackpot." The two screamed in fear.

FBaCC

Poopatine pulled the last of the laundry from the Laundromat washer. He had to fix theirs at home ASAP. This was a huge inconvenience. A janitor like him doing his laundry in a _Laundromat_? It simply wasn't done. He'd been getting giggled at by various women and scoffed at by whatever men came in with their wives and whatnot. And there were teenagers with strange fetishes with watching the washer or dryer spin while making out. Ugh, he dreaded the boys hitting their teenage years. Thank goodness _he_ hadn't had to deal with them like most would suspect.

Wait, what was he saying? He wouldn't still be raising them in their teenage years. By then he planned to be gone, right? He shoved the things into the laundry basket then headed out after paying. He was glad _that_ was over. He wondered how the boys were doing. Perhaps it was a bad idea to leave them alone at home. He was certainly getting a bad feeling about it. He'd better hurry.

FBaCC

Kyle and Sigmund were zapping spell after spell at the wizard tooth fairy, screaming all the way. "Nein, get avay from me!" Sigmund screamed, scorching him with a fireball. The tooth fairy just laughed.

"Ibbity bibbity flibbity flab!" Kyle chanted, zapping him. The Fairy paused a moment but then shook it off.

"Vhat vas zat zorry attempt?" Sigmund demanded.

"A long shot," Kyle answered. "It was supposed to freeze him!"

Just then the fairy grabbed them both. They choked off as he dragged them to face him. "Now I've gotcha," he stated.

"Let us go!" Kyle shrieked, desperately trying to struggle free.

The wizard tooth fairy zapped them both, and before they could react they found themselves strapped down to torture tables side by side. The two screamed in horror, trying to struggle free as the tooth fairy cracked his knuckles. "I've been waitin' for this a long time," The two boys, whimpering, shook fearfully.

"S-S-Sigmund…" Kyle squeaked.

"I-I do not know," Sigmund replied, knowing Kyle was looking to him, the older brother, to find a solution.

"We're going to lose all our teeth!" Kyle screamed. Right on cue the wizard tooth fairy propped open their mouths, preparing to enter.

"Say ah," he sang slightly crazily.

"Ah," a new voice spoke from behind.

FBaCC

The tooth fairy gasped and spun to face the newcomer. There stood the janitor! "Hey, who are _you_?" the wizard tooth fairy asked.

"I'm their father," Poopatine replied icily. "I'd advise you let my children go," he warned.

"Yeah, and whatcha gonna do about it?" the tooth fairy growled.

"This!" Poopatine declared, revealing the tooth Sigmund had lost on the floor. The boys looked confused, as did the tooth fairy.

"What?" he asked.

Poopatine grinned icily then threw the tooth into the air and raised his hands, chanting, "I summon all pillows from bed, bath, and beyond!" Immediately the freshly cleaned pillows rose with growls, teeth appearing, and flew at the fairy and tooth! The tooth fairy screamed in horror and turned to flee. The pillows relentlessly pursued him.

"No, no, no!" he screamed.

"Feel the power of the dark side!" Poopatine crooned. In a panic the fairy fled screaming.

FBaCC

Poopatine walked over to the boys smirking icily. He released them from the tables they'd been strapped onto and the two sat up gawking. "H-how did you know that spell?" Kyle questioned.

Poopatine shrugged, answering, "I overheard it." With that he turned and walked away.

"Overheard it? From vhere?" Sigmund questioned Kyle.

"He seems to be just chalk full of excuses. They're fast running thin. Methinks he's keeping something secret from us," Kyle remarked, eyes suspiciously narrowing.

"Ze quvestion iz vhy?" Sigmund replied. The two looked uncertainly at the janitor who was now humming as he cleaned the bookshelf with a feather duster.


	4. Deadly Duo

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: First up today. Probably will be two posted.)

Deadly Duo

Dr. Acula sat in his home brooding over his loss to his patients. He never lost a victim; exceptions being those insane little costumed brats. He let them go for the sake of his own sanity, but he wanted these boys' blood. Now that he had been in close proximity to their father, he sensed that there was something in his bloodstream that called out to him like some dark forbidden fruit. But how to achieve those goals? Just then the door burst open. Dr. Acula hissed darkly and turned. However, on seeing his patient he gasped and leapt up. He recognized this character. The Wizard Tooth Fairy!

"Doc, you gotta help me. Them pillow's is insane," the tooth fairy declared.

"Ze vhat?" Dr. Acula asked.

"I went to take a tooth from a couple of little Milkweed brats, but their father intervened before I got them. He set a group of pillows after me with razor sharp teeth!" the tooth fairy exclaimed.

"Ze Bloodworth-Thomason's?" Dr. Acula instantly questioned.

"Ya know them mate?" the tooth fairy asked.

"I vant zeir blood! I am Count Dracula, and zey are my desired fill," Dr. Acula declared.

"Really?" the tooth fairy questioned.

"Of course!" Dracula exclaimed.

"Mate, ya ain't the only one who wants em," the tooth fairy declared. "Save a piece for me. You take their father, I get the boys. You can finish with 'em when I'm done."

"You are suggesting a partnership?" Dr. Acula questioned.

"Why not mate?" the Tooth Fairy questioned as Acula began to stitch him up.

Acula tossed the idea around for a while. Well, it could be advantageous to them. Yes. Very advantageous. After a moment, finishing up the last stitch the vampire replied, "It's a deal."

"Great. We'll have 'em in no time," the Wizard Tooth Fairy declared, shaking his hand.

FBaCC

"Papa, what are you doing?" Kyle questioned as Janitor Poopatine paused in the middle of fixing the washer, looking sharply up.

"I sense a disturbance…" Poopatine replied, looking around cautiously. Kyle handed him a wrench.

"Ze lack uf enchanted items in zis shabby hovel?" Sigmund nipped, having to butter his own toast and not being pleased about it.

"I'll have you know not everything's about enchantment! It's a wonder you can tie your own shoes with your reliance on it," Kyle nipped.

"Even if it _were_ enchanted you'd be doing that on your own. I won't have any children of _mine_ reliant on magic and helpless without it. It's best you learn to do things independently, young Sigmund," Poopatine backed up, going back into the oven.

"But I am ein star! Ugh, I do not have to put up vith zis," Sigmund complained.

"Speaking of stardom, when are you leaving for work?" Kyle questioned as he continued to play the game he'd been playing.

"Half un hour," Sigmund answered boredly. "Uf course zey still vant me to lift ein skyscraper."

"I thought I'd made it clear you weren't to do any such thing," Poopatine said, finally coming out of the washer and standing, wiping off the grime from his hands with a cloth and kicking it shut. "Cheap appliances," he complained as an afterthought.

"For the record the sink is acting up," Kyle remarked.

"I'll put it at the top of my list," Poopatine replied. "Probably need to get some drain cleaner. Anyway, Sigmund?" Poopatine questioned again.

"Apparently you did not make it clear enough," Sigmund replied, taking a bite out of his toast. At least he could eat again now that the tooth problem was cleared up.

"Well I'll be making myself clearer _this_ time," Poopatine declared in annoyance. "I'll drive you in. I need to buy the drain cleaner anyway before the store closes tonight. It's almost ten."

"Fine," Sigmund agreed.

FBaCC

"Oh papa, I need a ride to the dentist," Kyle added.

"What time?" Poopatine questioned.

"Tomorrow evening," Kyle answered.

"Wonderful. How long will the appointment be?" Poopatine asked, writing these things down on the calendar.

"About half an hour," Kyle replied. "They're supposed to be doing something with my braces."

"Vhat am _I_ supposed to do zen?" Sigmund asked.

"I'll take you to the centre of town so you can practice your trick. Your producer probably won't let you off without doing it, but perhaps we can compromise in building height. We need to know how much you can lift without killing yourself," Poopatine declared.

"Fine," Sigmund relented.

"Anything else that needs to be addressed, boys?" Poopatine questioned.

"Not at present," Kyle replied.

"Nein," Sigmund said.

"Good. Sigmund, let's go," Poopatine ordered, beckoning for the child to follow.

"Oh wait! Can you drop me off at the library? I have some books to return," Kyle stated.

"Come along," Poopatine declared, gesturing for Kyle to follow. Quickly the boy summoned the books to him then raced out as well.

FBaCC

No sooner had the door locked and the lights flicked off when a bat landed outside of the window, glaring in. Soon a figure thumped onto the building next to it. The bat hissed then warned, "Be quviet you fool!"

"I ain't quiet, mate," the other replied. Dr. Acula and the Wizard Tooth Fairy!

"Imbecile. Very vell. Vhere are they?" Dr. Acula questioned, peering in.

"It don't matter if they're here or gone. You can still get in," the Wizard Tooth Fairy replied.

"Idiot! If they suspect an intruder it is game over!" Dracula shot.

"Well then what are we supposed ta do mate?" the fairy questioned.

"Come, Igor, let us find a way inside," Dr. Acula declared.

"Got it," the tooth fairy said. Wordlessly he smashed in the window! Dr. Acula gaped in horror.

"No you moron! Now zey vill know!" Dr. Acula exclaimed.

"Trust me mate, they ain't gonna have a clue," the tooth fairy said.

Dr. Acula growled but flew in through the window. He hovered in front of the calendar, reading it. After a moment he turned and said, "Vell my friend, you have your break. Ze youngest boy, Kyle, vill be going into a dentist's appointment tomorrow evening."

"Really?" he excitedly questioned, quickly going over as Acula became human again. "Jackpot! But wait, what if his father and brother are there?"

"Zey von't be. At least, not zeir fazher. He vill be dead in some alley," Dr. Acula stated.

"Won't ya turn him immortal if ya bite him mate?" the Wizard Tooth Fairy questioned.

"An excellent quvestion, Igor," Dr. Acula replied. "No. I have found a vay to drain a being of every drop and zey vill not come back as one of us. It is a talent."

"So no chance of daddy coming back to save his baby boys?" the tooth fairy questioned.

"No," the vampire replied.

FBaCC

"What about the eldest?" the tooth fairy asked. "We can only deal with two of them. If that kid finds his father's body or senses his little bro's in trouble…" the fairy began.

"He von't. He vill be busy practicing," Acula declared, pointing to a calendar again.

"How do you think this'll happen?" the tooth fairy questioned.

"Zeir fazher vill drop Kyle off at ze dentist's office. You vill take care of him there. While he is there, Poopatine vill be busy vith Sigmund. Likely he vill leave Sigmund at some point to go check on Kyle's progress. Vhen he does, he vill be mine. Luckily it vill be evening. Sigmund vill be alone, you vill have dealt vith Kyle, Poopatine vill be dead, and Sigmund vill be suspicious. He vill go check on Kyle. If he runs into his papa's body, all ze better. He vill hurry more. Vhen he arrives, ve trap him. Vhile you take the teeth, I finish his brother. Vhen I have finished vith Kyle, I vill come and finish Sigmund," Acula replied.

"If something goes wrong or some step ain't followed? Like what if Sigmund goes with Poopatine?" the fairy asked.

"Then I vill finish Kyle first," Acula stated. Vhen they are trying to revive him, I get Poopatine, you grab Sigmund. I drain Poopatine then the rest is easy. Sigmund will fall soon after," Acula stated.

"Right on mate. Then why we here?" Wizard Tooth Fairy asked.

"Ze plan vas to get zem vhile zey slept, but if one screams, ze others vill be too close for us to succeed. Now zat ve know zeir plans, ve have them," Dr. Acula declared.

"All right, I like," Tooth Fairy agreed.

"Excellent. Come, Igor, we must away," Dracula ordered. Quickly the two left, Tooth Fairy zapping the window repaired as they went.


	5. Spell

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Second up today. This one is darker than usual, I'll admit, just so you know. What do the reader's think? Sort of crucial to the plot, but still. Airmed was the Celtic goddess of healing and resurrection. Hecate was the Greek goddess of the dark arts. The spell you see is in Latin, its translation, according to Google Translate, right after it. Enjoy.)

Spell

"How long will this take?" Kyle questioned as Poopatine parked the Dump Star outside the library.

"It shouldn't take long," Poopatine assured.

"Hours," Sigmund sang.

"Not while _I_ live and breathe," Poopatine replied. "An hour at most. It's late. If he wanted to shoot this he should have done it on a weekend in the morning or afternoon, _not_ on a school night."

"Brave man," Sigmund remarked.

"I'm a father now, I _have_ to be," Poopatine replied.

"As if you weren't before," Kyle said. Poopatine chuckled darkly and patted his head.

"Go on you, scoot," he prompted. Kyle grinned and leapt out, darting to the library. "Be ready in an hour!" Poopatine called after him.

"Yes sir!" Kyle replied. With that, Poopatine and Sigmund pulled away to head towards the filming location.

FBaCC

Hearing the Dump Star pull to a stop, the producer looked over. "Sigmund, baby, about time," he greeted.

"Bad scheduling you old fool," Sigmund sang. "I vill now reference you to mein fazher," he added.

The producer looked curiously over and gasped on seeing the man's displeased expression. "Ten at night?" Poopatine growled.

"It needs to be relatively dark," the Producer defended.

"Well then you can schedule your next shooting for a weekend. You have one hour with him before I'm taking him home. He has school tomorrow," Poopatine declared.

"His contract says…" the producer began.

"I don't care what the contract says! He signed it without parental consent, it's null and void if I so choose to make it so," Poopatine declared. "Oh, and as for the skyscraper, I'd advise you simply have him lift up the demonstration house tonight. No questions asked." The producer swallowed and numbly nodded. There was no room for argument here. He'd learned by now not to push his luck with _this_ character.

FBaCC

Kyle yawned and laid his head on the desk. There were so many books here he hardly knew where to begin. He closed his eyes. He would just take a small nap. He yawned again and drifted off. For a time there was nothing, just a blissful slumber, then all at once he began to hear hissing in his mind. Hissing? Not a snake… A vampire! He heard cruel laughter. He recognized that laughter. The Tooth Fairy. Through the darkness of his mind appeared Dr. Acula and the Wizard Tooth Fairy standing side by side grinning maliciously. Were they _partnered_? But _why_?

He heard screaming. Whose was it? Wait, it was his! "No, no!" a voice was shrieking over his screams and sobs. Sigmund? Wait, something was wrong! He felt as if he were tied down, felt excruciating pain, then a bite on his neck. He gasped.

"Help me!" he screamed. "Daddy, Sigmund, help!"

"Kyle!" Sigmund's voice shouted desperately. Soon, though, that was replaced by screams of agony. "Daddy!" Sigmund screamed.

"Your father is dead, boys. He von't be coming for you zis time," Acula's voice declared.

On cue the image changed to the vampire draining Poopatine's body of blood and the man falling to the ground in a back alley. "No!" he heard himself and Sigmund screaming. He felt as if he were desperately struggling. This couldn't be! This simply couldn't be! Someone wake him up.

"Constipator!" a voice yelled as he felt himself being shaken.

Kyle gasped and sat up straight with a scream. He looked quickly around. "Sigmund, you're alive!" he exclaimed, leaping at Sigmund. Sigmund twitched as Kyle latched on, then shoved him off with a frown.

"Vhat did you get into?" Sigmund demanded.

"Sigmund, it was awful! You see I dreamed…" Kyle began.

"I do not care. Get your things. Fazher is getting impatient," Sigmund answered, walking off with a wave.

FBaCC

Kyle twitched. Well that was counterproductive. The dream came back in detail and he screamed, holding his head. That was more of a vision than a dream! "Necronomicon!" he cried desperately.

"What _now_?" the book questioned, flying out of his backpack.

"Necronomicon, you must help me! Give me a protection slash regeneration spell, please! I'm afraid something is going to happen to me and Sigmund and papa!" Kyle exclaimed.

"A protection regeneration spell? Boy, you have lost your mind! You aren't skilled enough to even risk _trying_ one of those! That is a professional spell!" Necronomicon exclaimed.

"I don't care, I have to try! Necronomicon, please!" Kyle begged.

"Kyle, whatever is the matter?" the book questioned. Kyle burst suddenly into tears, sobbing. The Necronomicon could only blink as Kyle blubbered out the whole dream in graphic detail that made the Necronomicon himself feel queasy. When he was done, Necronomicon declared solemnly, "I am sorry, young master Kyle, but I cannot let you go through with this."

"But Necronomicon…" Kyle began.

"No," Necronomicon flatly refused. "It could kill you." Kyle began to cry again.

"Kyle!" an annoyed voice barked. Kyle looked over with a gasp. There stood Poopatine.

"Papa!" Kyle exclaimed, running to him and holding on tightly, sobbing. Poopatine, shocked, held him back. What was going on here? He looked back at Necronomicon with a puzzled expression. Necronomicon shook his head, signalling he'd fill him in later.

Poopatine looked down at Kyle, soothing, "There, there my boy. There, there." Kyle shook his head in denial. Of what Poopatine wasn't sure. By tonight, though, he'd better have some answers. He picked the child up and carried him out to the Dump Star.

FBaCC

On seeing Kyle, Sigmund raised a suspicious eyebrow and questioned boredly, "Vhat iz vith ze Constipator?"

"I have no clue," Poopatine replied, putting Kyle down. Depressed, Kyle went to his seat and buckled in. "Kyle, what's happening?"

"Nightmare," Kyle vaguely replied. Poopatine knew, though, that this couldn't have been a mere nightmare.

"Oh really?" he suspiciously asked.

Kyle blinked up at him then replied quietly, "A vision…"

"A vision?!" Sigmund exclaimed, snapping his head around now paying close attention. "Impossible!"

"A vision?" Poopatine mused in wonder. "Why, that's a _huge_ milestone. You shouldn't even develop visions until your teenage years. Well, with some exceptions." Sigmund suspiciously glared at Poopatine.

"I would be ecstatic, if I weren't so depressed," Kyle replied quietly. At least Sigmund wasn't the only one now to hit a milestone he shouldn't have.

"Vhy?" Sigmund questioned, finally looking away from Poopatine to face Kyle.

"Never mind," Kyle quietly said.

FBaCC

Poopatine watched worriedly from the door of Kyle's room as the child slept, whimpering often in his sleep. Necronomicon floated up to peer in as well. Poopatine spared the book a glance then looked back at Kyle, saying, "I'm worried about him. He hasn't stopped whimpering. It's like he's trying to wake up but can't."

"I'll tell you everything," Necronomicon offered. "Not here, though. It's too close to your eldest son's room." Poopatine sighed then nodded, following the book.

The two sat in the study and Poopatine prompted, "Well…"

Necronomicon took a breath then replied, "He had a vision nightmare. In it Dr. Acula and the Wizard Tooth Fairy had teamed up against you three. A vendetta upon your family, Russ. He heard screams of pain, his. He heard Sigmund screaming and begging something to let someone go. Then Sigmund began to scream in pain too. They both screamed for you but you weren't there."

"What?" Poopatine asked. "But that's impossible! I would be there in a heartbeat!"

"No, you were dead," Necronomicon stated. Poopatine's mouth dropped. Brenda whistled and beeped fearfully, seizing his hand with her metal claws. He was too shocked to do anything. He didn't even realize Brenda had turned to look at the children's doors fearfully. "Dr. Acula had drained you of every drop of life."

"No…" he muttered numbly.

"Kyle woke up in a panic and begged me to reveal a protection regeneration spell to him. He wanted to cast it so that if the time came, and the vision came true, you would be protected. All of you. And even if Acula did 'kill' you, he wouldn't have really because the regeneration spell would prevent your death and maybe they would have a chance. They both died in the end as well you see," Necronomicon narrated.

FBaCC

Poopatine was silent as he digested all of this. Finally he remarked, "Really…"

"I have told you everything," Necronmicon verified. Poopatine was quiet again. "My Lord?" the book questioned.

Poopatine's eyes flicked sharply in his direction, warning him off. Finally he said, "Open up and show me the protection regeneration spell."

"You have lost your mind, sir," the book hissed. "If I won't let a trained wizard do it, why would I let _you_? That would lead to questions you will _not_ have me answer. I couldn't get out of them. What would the boy think if I let an untrained janitor do the spell I wouldn't let _him_ do under any circumstances? Him _or_ his brother."

"Necronomicon, I grow impatient," Poopatine growled in warning.

Necronomicon swallowed then sighed. "You are digging yourself deeper into a hole," the book warned briefly. With that it opened up to one of the spells on the second to last 'chapter.'

Poopatine pulled the book near and looked over it. "This is supposed to be difficult?" he remarked.

"It will kill either of those boys if they ever dared try it so early on," Necronomicon replied seriously.

"Of course," Poopatine grumbled. He shut the book then rose, raising his hands in the air. Shutting his eyes he more prayed than chanted, "Airmed, dico vobis. Per me, concedo tibi potentia, dea sanitatum et resurrectionem. Per Hecate me et tuere me diligo!" Airmed, upon you I call. Through me grant your power, goddess of healing and resurrection. By means of Hecate, let me protect myself and those whom I love.

A flash of light shot out with a scream and divided into three colors; red, blue, and black. Instantly the three lights split apart. The red glow shot into Sigmund's room, the blue into Kyle's, and the black rushed into him. Poopatine chuckled darkly and looked at his hands in admiration. "I do hope you know what you are doing," Necronomicon remarked.

Poopatine frowned then nipped, "Of course I know! Calm yourself, Necronomicon, everything is under my control."

"That is what I'm afraid of. If the boys…" the book began.

"They shant," Poopatine assured. "Excellent," he added as he examined his hands in delight. "Everything that has transpired has done so according to _my_ design." Necronomicon shivered and floated into the bookshelf as Poopatine evilly laughed.


	6. Set In Motion

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Reviews are appreciated. As to my first reviewer, I was wondering when someone would pick up the fact that something was different about Poopatine. You're on the right track, but not a wizard, exactly.)

Set In Motion

"I detest dentist appointments," Kyle complained.

"Vhy?" Sigmund questioned.

"Because they poke and prod and make you choke on whatever little cleaning supplies they can," Kyle pouted.

"Come now, Kyle," Poopatine prodded, bringing him up to the counter where an old man was waiting. "Good evening. Appointment for Kyle Bloodworth Thomason."

"Very good. The dentist vill be vith you shortly. Unfortunately our regular had to cancel. There vill be a replacement," the man declared.

"Do ve know you?" Sigmund suspiciously questioned.

"Why, I do not believe you _do_," the man replied.

"Where's the regular secretary and my orthodontist?" Kyle demanded.

"They are on vacation," the man replied.

"They don't _go_ on vacation," Kyle declared suspiciously.

"Vell _this_ time they _have_," the man said.

FBaCC

"Kyle Bloodworth Thomason!" a voice called from the dental room. Kyle swallowed and turned. He couldn't see anything but a hand beckoning to him. Poopatine and Sigmund were obviously taken aback as well. "Your turn mate."

"Oh? Yes, well, very good then. Um, papa, can you accompany me?" Kyle nervously questioned.

"For a moment. I need to take your brother down town after you're settled," Poopatine reluctantly replied.

"The other boy can stay," the secretary eagerly offered.

Sigmund, however, didn't like the tone. He frowned and replied, "I vill go vith fazher danke." Haughtily he walked towards the room. Kyle swallowed and followed him, Poopatine taking up the rear.

Kyle lay in the chair sweating, looking at the shadowed figure against the wall tying a mask on. "I don't like this," Kyle quietly remarked to Poopatine.

"Calm yourself my boy," Poopatine assured.

"I'll be back in a while," the dentist declared. "I gotta fix somethin.'" With that he left.

"Vell, ve cannot stay. Come fazher, let us leave," Sigmund impatiently declared.

"Hold on boy. Kyle, will you be alright?" Poopatine questioned.

"I-I'm not sure," Kyle honestly answered.

"Shall I leave Brenda here?" Poopatine questioned.

Kyle started. Had he actually just offered to leave _Brenda_? "It would help," Kyle quietly said. "But I can also conjure up Scrivener elf. Something's telling me it would be a bad idea to leave Brenda here."

"If you're sure," Poopatine stated.

"Yes sir," Kyle replied.

"I would stay, but I promised your brother I would help him with his trick. If you start to get afraid, though, call me immediately," Poopatine said.

"Fine," Kyle quietly said.

"Good, let's go," Sigmund prompted, heading out. Poopatine sighed, ruffled Kyle's hair, then followed Sigmund out. Kyle swallowed fearfully. Why did he get the feeling this would only end badly?

FBaCC

"Kyle iz such ein baby," Sigmund insulted.

"That's enough, Sigmund," Poopatine warned. "That vision really rattled him."

"He iz ein coward," Sigmund said, waving his hand dismissively.

"Funny, shutting down at the mere mention of clowns isn't cowardice?" Poopatine questioned sarcastically.

"Zat iz different!" Sigmund defended.

"How?" Poopatine asked.

"Phobia's are medically diagnosed," Sigmund excused quickly and vaguely.

"Vision's, Sigmund, are not to be taken lightly," Poopatine warned. "Especially when people die in them."

"Who _died_?" Sigmund questioned, boredly examining his nails.

"First it was me," Poopatine replied. Sigmund started, sharply looking at him. "Then it was Kyle, and you followed soon after. Of course in the meantime you and Kyle were shrieking and screaming in anguish and terror." Sigmund blinked at him in shock. Poopatine pulled to a stop and said, "All right, here we are. Out of the car. Let's practice."

FBaCC

Sigmund raised a three story building relatively easily. "Zhere," he boasted.

"Very good my son. Now, let's try something a little more difficult," Poopatine prompted, gesturing at a six story building. Sigmund looked up at it and swallowed. He focused his energy and gritted his teeth. Soon enough it had lifted as well! Sigmund grinned boastfully. "Twelve," Poopatine pressed.

Sigmund blinked at him then looked at the skyscraper he was gesturing to. Sigmund shifted uncomfortably but zapped it. He gasped slightly, but it rose. Poopatine pursed his lips. They were pushing it now. "Now?" Sigmund asked.

"Twenty-four," Poopatine answered. Sigmund paused, looking at him. The building size he couldn't lift. Sigmund looked at it then his eyes narrowed. Oh this time he would do it. He wouldn't give up! No building was too much for _him_. Sigmund zapped it with all his might and tried to lift. He cried out in pain in moments, however, sweating. He kept trying. "Enough," Poopatine directed.

"Nein," he replied. He screamed in pain, falling to his knees right after.

"Sigmund, I said enough!" Poopatine shot, eyes now narrowed. He was pushing himself.

"I vill lift zis," Sigmund answered, barely. He paused, panting, and looked at it determinedly.

"Easy, son. Let it go. We can compromise," Poopatine assured.

"I can do it!" Sigmund insisted, eyes furiously blazing.

"Can you?" Poopatine questioned. Sigmund was silent. He then turned to the object and gritted his teeth. He focused on the high skyscraper and desperately tried to lift it. Soon enough, though, he screamed in pain and fell to the ground. Poopatine was there in an instant, helping him up. Sigmund, gasping, leaned heavily on him for support. His nose was bleeding. Poopatine placed a tissue to it. Sigmund held it in place looking hopelessly down. Gently Poopatine declared, putting his hands on the boy's shoulders, "The force is with you, young Sigmund, but you're not a magi yet." Sigmund looked helplessly up at the tower, ego bruised deeply.

FBaCC

"Man, where's this doctor guy?" Scrivener Elf questioned in annoyance.

"I'm not sure. Scrivener Elf, I don't like it," Kyle replied.

"Kid, I ain't too thrilled to be here _either_. I'm goin' to the bathroom," Scrivener elf said, walking off. Kyle waited for a long time. It was silent. Where was that elf of his? Rather, where was the dentist?

"Um, hello, where are you?!" Kyle called nervously into the empty room. It had been too long. Just then the lights went out. Kyle gasped in fear. "Um, perhaps I'll just leave and reschedule," he added. Suddenly leather straps shot out, catching his arms! He blinked then gasped. "Scrivener Elf, where are you?" Kyle called.

"Kyle, what's goin' on?" Scrivener Elf questioned.

"I-I don't know! I'm trapped! Help!" Kyle cried.

Just then, however, the light above the chair went on and Kyle gasped. He blanched on seeing the face emerge above him anda loud scream erupted from his mouth. _The tooth fairy_! "G'day mate. I'm here ta collect my dues," the wizard tooth fairy declared.

"Noooooo!" Kyle screamed in terror, the vision suddenly coming back in full force. "Help me! Papa, Sigmund!"

"Aw no, hang on kid, I'll get help," Scrivener Elf muttered, eyes fearful. He was lucky to have avoided detection. Quickly he disappeared, racing to find Poopatine or Sigmund.

FBaCC

"What are you doing?" a voice questioned from behind Poopatine.

Poopatine turned curiously. "Francine," he greeted on seeing the person.

"Vhat now?" Sigmund asked, losing focus. The building dropped with a bang and they heard people scream in fear. They looked over at it cringing, then Sigmund looked back at Francine clearing his throat awkwardly. Here was hoping the people inside didn't guess it was him. "Francine?" he greeted curiously.

"I was walking by," she said with a bored shrug.

"Vell don't let us keep you," Sigmund said.

"Actually, this is amusing," she replied, sitting. He harrumphed and turned back to the building.

Poopatine checked his watch. "I'm going to go check on your brother, Sigmund. Are you done practicing?" Poopatine questioned.

"Nein, not yet. I vant to get in a few more attempts vith ze tvelve story tower," Sigmund answered.

"All right, I'll be back in a while," Poopatine replied. "You get bored you know where to come."

"Yes fazher," Sigmund replied.

Looking to Francine, Poopatine added, "Francine, watch him. He has a tendency to do foolish things. You kids have fun. If he collapses, call me immediately. Twenty-four story buildings are off bounds for him." Francine started, shocked. Well, this was interesting. With that, Poopatine walked off.

FBaCC

"Boss, boss! Where the heck _are_ you, boss?!" Scrivener elf called desperately, running along the road as he searched for the janitor. "Sigmund, hey sorcerer boy, yoo hoo!" No answers. This was bad, very bad. Kyle was in danger and he couldn't find _anyone_! "Help, someone! Kyle's in danger!" he shouted in a last desperate attempt.

"Kyle's in danger?" a voice questioned curiously.

Scrivener elf screeched to a halt. "Huh?" he questioned, looking over to the side. There stood a young girl with glasses. Sort of pretty, a little nerdy probably, but pretty. "Who are _you_?" Scrivener Elf asked.

"My name is Nancy. I'm one of Kyle's classmates. What's happening to Kyle?" she asked, now worried.

"He's in trouble," Scriviner Elf replied. "I'm tryin' to find his father and brother before he gets it big time! Hey, maybe you can do me a favor. Get to the dentist's office and cause a distraction or something, quick!"

"Wh-what's going to happen?" she questioned, alarmed. This didn't sound good.

"Pain, suffering, and death if his vision's to be believed," Scriviner Elf replied. With that he ran off. Nancy gasped, covering her mouth and shaking her head. Quickly she turned and ran towards the dentist's office.

FBaCC

Poopatine walked towards the office humming. He heard a squeak and paused. What was that? He looked up. Above him floated a group of bats, silhouetted against the moonlight. He smirked. He'd always liked the creatures, really. His smile fell, however, on noticing one particularly large one just hovering in the middle of them. Its eyes seemed to bore right through him. He felt himself bristling. Choosing to ignore he continued on. He entered a particularly long alleyway. Just then, though, he heard footsteps. He paused. Quickly he looked back. Nothing. But there, dangling from a line, was the large bat from before!

Poopatine blinked blankly at it. This wasn't good. Not at all. His eyes narrowed. "Why hello there little one. What brings you so far from your friends?" Poopatine called cheerily to it. The bat blinked and screeched, dropping and flying towards him. It landed on a garbage bin glaring at him. "There you are. I know what you are, yes I do," he sang. And oh how he did.

"Do you now?" the bat replied.

Poopatine started. He supposed he wasn't surprised, but a bat talking would shock anyone. He blinked then scowled, shooting, "A vampire, are you? Well bring it on!"

"Gladly," the thing replied. All at once he transformed into none other than Dr. Acula!

"You!" Poopatine exclaimed, startled.

"The vun and only," Acula replied.

"Well I'm _really_ going to enjoy this," Poopatine declared.

"Not as much as _I_ vill," Acula declared. All at once the creature sprang viciously. Poopatine met him head on, the two rolling across the ground. Poopatine tore at him viciously, but the vampire kept up easily.

"Did you get stronger?" Poopatine growled as he fought.

"The night is my element," Dracula answered. He struck Poopatine viciously. Poopatine cried out in pain. Well, _this_ was unexpected. Had he really become this rusty, this _weak_? He scrambled away. Hmm, perhaps he wasn't ready to deal with this. It had been so long since the last… never mind. Wait. Where did the man go? All at once he felt himself being tackled from behind. He screamed in pain and before he could do a thing, Dracula had rolled him over and sank his teeth into his neck! Poopatine screamed again, struggling desperately. Acula wouldn't be moved.

No, this wasn't happening! It couldn't be! He felt himself getting weaker and weaker. His pushing became pathetic. Finally all he could do was gape and cling to the man with his remaining strength as Dr. Acula passed beyond critical blood loss. He breathed weakly as gradually the vampire had his fill. Finally the man fell back, still and pale. Dr. Acula rose up and wiped his mouth. He laughed evilly then turned into a bat. Now to watch over Sigmund. As soon as that boy got to the dentist's office, they would trap him and he would finish Kyle.


	7. Vengeance

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Poopatine may be gone, he may not, but when Sigmund and Kyle find out what's happened to their father, heads will roll. Humor will be back next chapter, to some degree, but in this chapter and part of the next chapter there won't be much room for it.)

Vengeance

Sigmund cried out in pain as he lifted an eighteen story building. He was on his knees, weak and shivering. Francine gaped in shock. Finally he put it down and fell forward gasping. She hurried up to him and knelt, taking his arm and helping him up. "Aren't _you_ the strong one?" she asked.

"Quvit flirting, but danke shon," he proudly replied. "Now far ze nineteen floor vun."

"Uh, yeah, no. That's enough. I shouldn't have even let you do _that_. You almost collapsed," she replied.

"I can do it!" he insisted.

"Not on your life. Let's go," Francine replied. Sigmund harrumphed.

Just then a voice cried, "Sigmund, hurry!"

Sigmund and Francine looked sharply over. "Scrivener elf?" Sigmund questioned in confusion. "Veren't you supposed to be vith Kyle?"

"I was, but we got a problem," the elf replied. "We were waiting when the lights went out and Kyle got strapped to the chair! Next thing he knows, the Wizard Tooth Fairy shows up and he's helpless! I ran to get help and bumped into Nancy. She's gone to cause a distraction, but he's in big trouble," the elf exclaimed.

"Vhat!?" Sigmund exclaimed.

"Oh boy, more freaky stuff," Francine boredly said. Sigmund blinked at her then shrugged. She had a point, but then Galaxy Hills was weird.

"Fine, I vill go catch up to fazher und rescue Kyle. Again," Sigmund said in annoyance. "Feel up to un adventure?" he asked Francine.

"Why not," Francine replied, shrugging. Quickly the two ran off with Scrivener Elf following.

FBaCC

Nancy burst into the dentist's office and looked around. It was pitch black except for an eerie glow coming from a nearby room. "No, no, no!" she heard Kyle screaming desperately.

"Kyle!" she screeched. She raced towards the door and threw it open, yelling, "Excuse me Mr. Dentist!"

Everything froze. She paled on seeing the predicament Kyle was in. He was strapped to a table, the Wizard Tooth Fairy hovering over him with a particularly unpleasant looking object clenched on one of the boy's teeth. There was silence. What happened from here? Finally the tooth fairy said, "I'll be with you in a minute."

"I don't have _time_ to wait. I'm expected somewhere. You're only touching up braces, he can wait," Nancy replied, racing over and grabbing the tooth fairy's device, pulling it off of Kyle's tooth and tossing it to the side.

"Nancy, whatever are you _doing_!?" Kyle demanded.

"Who now?" the fairy asked. "This your girlfriend mate?"

"No! I'm only twelve!" Kyle exclaimed.

"I go to school with him. Come on already," Nancy prompted, grabbing the fairies arm and pulling him towards the door.

"Not so fast, sheila! I ain't done with him yet," the tooth fairy shot, pulling free.

"Yes you are," Nancy retorted icily, folding her arms and getting between him and Kyle.

"Nancy, don't make him angry! You need to run!" Kyle exclaimed.

"No way. I'm not going anywhere," Nancy replied, looking back.

"Then you'll go down _with_ him," the tooth fairy menacingly threatened, advancing towards them.

FBaCC

Scrivener Elf, Sigmund, and Francine darted into an alley. "Why are we, like, going this way?" Francine questioned.

"Because it iz ein shortcut. Fazher vould have taken it. Vith luck ve vill catch up to him," Sigmund answered.

"It's so long and dark, though," Francine complained. "Ugh, what was I thinking?"

"I am not fond uf it eizher," Sigmund answered testily. Just then Francine tripped over something and screamed as she fell. "Vhat?" Sigmund sharply asked, fearing something had happened and turning quickly.

"I-I tripped over something soft," she answered. Sigmund helped her up. The two peered at the figure lying in the alley, unmoving. "Is-is that a…" Francine began, eyes widening as they made out the shape on the ground.

"Ein body?" Sigmund tightly questioned. Poopatine could deal with saving Kyle, but this could be something big.

"Oh no…" Scrivener elf whispered, eyes widening in alarm, misery, and fear. He recognized the form all too well. "No, it can't be…" he repeated, shaking his head in denial.

"Vhat?"' Sigmund asked.

"Nothing! Keep going, just garbage," Scrivener elf quickly said, trying to shove the two along.

Sigmund, suspicious, pulled away and called up a ball of light. He knelt next to the body, Francine quickly hurrying to join him, then held it close. Instantly his throat tightened. The clothing… He recognized the clothing. His mouth dropped. "No…" Francine whispered, worriedly looking at Sigmund. Scrivener Elf didn't move. He supposed he could have tried to pull them away, but it would only have stalled the inevitable. He pursed his lips nervously as he wrung his hands together. He was afraid, he wouldn't hesitate to admit. What would the young sorcerer's reaction be? He had to be ready for anything.

FBaCC

Sigmund swallowed, bringing the light up near the face. On seeing it, however, he went white. Francine shrieked in horror, falling back. Sigmund's mouth opened but no scream came out. His voice wouldn't work and everything around him was vanishing to nothingness as he tried to comprehend what he was seeing. It was a nightmare, it had to be, it had to! No, no, no, this wasn't happening! But he knew full well he wasn't asleep.

Snapping out of it he gasped and screamed, "Fazher, fazher! Papa, vake up, papa!" Desperately he began to shake the man. "_Daddy_!" he pled desperately.

"Janitor Poopatine!" Francine cried in terror. Seeing Sigmund desperately trying to wake him, however, she raced over and pulled him back. Shivering, Sigmund gasped and held her tightly, sobbing and burying his head in her chest weeping. This wasn't happening, it wasn't. Not another loss, please, please any immortal that be… please, he'd lost so much already. Kyle's vision… No, no, no, no, _no_! "Sigmund, I-I'm so, so sorry. How…" she began, tears in her eyes. She'd never liked the janitor, but for the body to be someone she knew…

"Vampire bite," Scrivener Elf tightly replied, pointing at the two marks. All at once Sigmund stopped sobbing and gasped instead. Now Francine felt the change. Now it wasn't fear or sadness he was shaking from. Oh no, this time it was anger; pure unbridled fury. He was being overwhelmed by it.

"Sigmund…" Francine timidly began, taken aback at how fearful her voice sounded.

"Zey vill pay," he hissed viciously, crawling towards the man's body and putting his hands on it, looking into the face of the man who had been his father and protector when no one else was there.

"Who?" she tightly questioned.

"Dr. Acula und ze Vizard Tooth Fairy," Sigmund answered. "Zey have Kyle. Ve must hurry."

"Sigmund, what about…" Scrivener Elf began, gesturing at the body. Sigmund swallowed over a lump in his throat. With Poopatine gone he was now the so-called man of the house, and all responsibility fell on _him_. Finally he replied, "Bring him back home. Vhen Kyle iz back ve vill decided together." He looked at Francine and questioned flatly, "Are you coming?"

"Yes," she replied breathlessly. Sigmund nodded. In a daze she followed him. Above them, watching, was a bat. It hissed in displeasure then shot off towards the dentist's office. Dr. Acula!

FBaCC

Nancy screamed in pain as she hit the wall. "No, Nancy! Leave her alone you brute! It's me you want!" Kyle shouted at the Tooth Fairy. Nancy gasped as the fairy brought down his wand. She dove out of the way. She couldn't keep this up much longer, she realized.

Kyle noticed she was getting tired. He needed to come up with a solution and fast! The figurative light bulb went off in his head just then, and Kyle closed his eyes, muttering a barely audible spell. The wand came down. Nancy screamed, but all at once it stopped above her! She blinked and looked at Kyle in shock. He'd muttered a shielding spell! She sighed in relief and wiped her forehead.

The tooth fairy apparently realized it as well. He scowled over at Kyle and walked swiftly towards him. Kyle swallowed. This was the end. "Tooth Fairy, emergency!" a voice suddenly exclaimed.

The tooth fairy looked quickly over. Right there materialized the vampire doctor! "Doc?" the fairy questioned in confusion.

"Ve have a problem. The boy's brother is on his way, but he has a friend vith him," Acula declared. Just then he noticed the girl and started. "Apparently so does ze boy," he added, scowling.

"Now what?" Tooth Fairy asked. "That girl ain't gonna let me near him."

"Then I vill deal vith the girl," Acula hissed. "Finish the child. Before his brother and company arrives."

"_Too_ late, _Dracula_!" a voice exclaimed. The two whirled with gasps. Sigmund! Francine was right behind him and Sigmund's eyes were blazing, almost literally on fire.

"Sigmund, Francine!" Nancy exclaimed.

"Sigmund, get father!" Kyle cried. On seeing Sigmund's suddenly crestfallen look, however, and Francine look down, he paled. He knew what this meant. "N-no," he stammered weakly, going white.

"Your father is dead, boys, but do not vorry. You vill be joining him soon," Acula stated.

"No! Liar! He's not dead, he's _not_! He _can't_ be, he simply _can't_ be!" Kyle screamed, struggling desperately. He fell back and began to sob. Who was he kidding? Of course he was.

"You vill pay!" Sigmund shrieked furiously.

FBaCC

Viciously he ran at the Doctor and Fairy, hands lit up. The tooth fairy shot a blast at him as Dr. Acula dove at Francine. Francine dove out of the way. Nancy leapt into action and ran to the table Kyle was strapped to. Quickly she unstrapped him and Kyle leapt up, suddenly shaking with unbridles hatred and anger. Sigmund cried out in pain and Kyle sharply looked over. Dr. Acula was going for his throat! "Oh no you don't!" Kyle shot viciously. He grabbed his wand and shot a vicious blast at Acula. The vampire went flying. Kyle met the tooth fairies attack and fought back. "For father!" he exclaimed, zapping the fairy. The fairy went flying. Nancy and Francine ducked under the projectile. In fact, they stayed down because the blasts were flying everywhere, and each one was fueled by anger and hatred and misery and vengeance. Neither of the girls had ever seen the wizards display such power before.

"Feel ze power uf Sigmund ze Sorcerer!" Sigmund declared, eyes glowing red as he attacked them both full on. Kyle leapt on their other side as they tried to flee, his own eyes glowing blue, and attacked as well so that two creatures were trapped in the crossfire! The vampire and tooth fairy screamed in pain as the attacks wore them down. "I summon all pillows from bed, bath, und beyond!" Sigmund exclaimed loudly. Instantly pillows went at the Tooth Fairy. He screamed as they burned him on contact, though they didn't have teeth like… he wiped the thought away. He wouldn't think about the man now.

"By the shine of morning's light, send back this creature of the night!" Kyle chanted, zapping Acula. A ray of sun flew from the wand engulfing the vampire. Acula screamed in pain as it burned him badly. He was turning to ash!

"Quvickly, retreat!" Acula declared. The tooth fairy suddenly zapped Francine and Nancy with a powerful blast. The two girls shrieked in anguish, sobbing!

The two boys gasped and cut off the spells before they finished. "Francine!" Sigmund exclaimed.

"Nancy!" Kyle cried. Instantly the duo raced over to the two girls, now lying shivering on the floor. There was a bang and they turned. The fairy and Acula were gone!

"Nein," Sigmund muttered.

"No time, they're hurt," Kyle quickly said. "We can't lose them like we did father! Sigmund, what do we do?"

"I… I do not know," Sigmund replied helplessly, and the tone shocked him because never before did he recall sounding so helpless. The two boys swallowed, tears in their eyes, and turned to the girls. First their father, now their classmates.

FBaCC

The two boys looked helplessly down at their friends. After a moment, however, they began to stir. The two gasped. The girls weakly sat up. "Ooh, what hit me?" Francine questioned.

"A Wizard Tooth Fairy," Nancy grimly replied.

"Girls, you're alive!" Kyle exclaimed. The two girls blinked at them.

"Whoa, we _are_," Francine said, surprised _herself_ that they were.

"You had better get home," Sigmund quietly added. Kyle started at the change in tone then remembered the reason for it. His expression crumbled into sadness.

"Kyle…" Nancy began, "I'm-I'm sorry about… about Poopatine," she finally managed to offer. Sigmund harrumphed as Kyle sniffed. He waved his hand and like that the two boys were gone. Francine and Nancy exchanged looks. They would be glad to get back home, that was for sure.

FBaCC

Scrivener Elf looked helplessly down at Poopatine, who lay still and cold. "What am I supposed to tell the kids?" he questioned Necronomicon, who was watching as well.

"I would not worry for that," Necronomicon replied. "He had a failsafe."

"Failsafe?" Scrivener Elf asked. Necronomicon hesitated, then quietly told the story of what Poopatine had done. Scrivener Elf gaped in shock and looked back at the janitor. "He pulled off a professional spell? The could ruin everything, though. Man, talk about walking on the edge. So why hasn't it kicked in?"

"I don't know," Necronomicon answered.

Scrivener Elf frowned, putting a hand to his head. "I sense that they're transporting here," he declared.

"Then let us make ourselves scarce. Let them have their reunion," Necronomicon declared. Quickly the book went into the shelf, Scrivener elf disappeared with a snap.

FBaCC

The boys appeared in the living room and looked helplessly at the couch around which candles were set in a perfectly grim scene. Kyle's eyes were wide as he squeaked, timidly moving towards the body, "Daddy?"

Sigmund swallowed then followed him. The two knelt next to the body and looked hopefully at it. Sigmund fingered the vampire bite marks. "Ze vampire drained him," he quietly stated. "He iz gone."

"But-but no… He should have let me do the protection resurrection spell!" Kyle viciously exclaimed, hitting the couch with his fists.

"Protection resurrection spell? It vould have killed _me_ let alone _you_," Sigmund answered, the two still kneeling by the body.

"But he would still be here _now_," Kyle quietly argued.

"Somevun vould have passed on eizher vay," Sigmund gently—which was a tone he never _ever_ used, _especially_ with Kyle—stated.

"Sigmund… what are we going to do?" Kyle questioned softly.

"I don't know," Sigmund replied. The two closed their eyes tightly and sniffed, leaning on his chest.

"You're going to stop crying and get me water, and lots of it," a voice suddenly replied. The two gasped and looked sharply up. Surely it couldn't have been the janitor. He was _dead_. Sure enough, though, the man was staring right at them, alive and well!

"Father!" they screeched together. They instantly attached to him.

"B-but how?" Kyle asked, sobbing.

"Ze only vay zis vould vork iz vith ze regeneration spell!" Sigmund added through tears, trying not to cry but failing miserably. "Kyle nevair did it, zough."

"No, _I_ did," Poopatine replied.

"You!?" the two exclaimed at once, looking at him in horrified shock.

"That's impossible! You're not even a wizard!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Fluke," Poopatine replied.

"Enough vith ze excuses. Tell us how!" Sigmund ordered viciously, still hugging him.

"Water, boys," Poopatine hinted. The two blinked at him. They wouldn't get any more out of the guy. Quickly they raced to gather the water.

FBaCC

Poopatine sat up. Instantly the children were back. He took the water and quickly drank the many, _many_, glasses. Putting them down, he said, "Much better."

"You're alive," Sigmund quietly said, voice breaking. The man blinked at the two wide eyed boys then smiled in amusement, eyes becoming soft and kind, an expression he never ever betrayed to anyone under any circumstance. Affection, once or twice maybe, but no more.

"You didn't think I would go that easily, did you?" he asked.

"Considering your track record I suppose I shouldn't be surprised," Kyle admitted, laughing through tears. The two held him tightly again. Poopatine hugged them back.

"I'm here, you two, I'm here," he assured. He frowned towards the window as he held them.

"What is it?" Kyle questioned, noticing this.

"I get the feeling Acula and the Tooth Fairy aren't done with us yet," Poopatine replied. "Acula will sense his victim lives again."

"And ze tooth fairy still vants our teeth," Sigmund added.

"Right. Be prepared, boys. We can't let our guards down yet. Now tell me about your little adventure," Poopatine prompted. The boys instantly launched into the narrative. When they were done, Poopatine remarked, "Your two little friends were quite bold."

"They were amazing!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Zey vere, veren't zey?" Sigmund questioned.

"Be sure to thank them for me," he replied.

"You can zank zem yourself," Sigmund replied.

"When you go back into work tomorrow," Kyle added. Poopatine smirked at the two and ruffled their hair affectionately.

"Very well," he relented. "But remember, children, they will strike when we least expect it. We cannot turn a blind eye to the fact they still lie in wait, stalking us, hunting us…" The three looked solemnly out the window. From somewhere atop a building the evil duo watched through the same window, icily frowning. Oh it was on now.


	8. Showdown

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Second up today.)

Showdown

"Yes? …No, we don't need that! …Hush, I don't want to hear it!" Poopatine shot into the phone receiver, cradling it with his neck. His hands were busy preparing a stir-fry and fish. An odd combination, but that was what they had in the house. He listened on the other end then frowned. "I told you boys, we aren't looking after Precious Pig! You two don't even _like_ him!" Silence… "I don't care if Cher and her sisters will ruin him beyond repair, count your blessings and be glad your two idiot friends, Kyle, aren't taking him… Yes I mean Fanboy and Chum Chum!" He listened to the two children argue a bit more then shot, "Oh Mufflin said that did he? Well then put him on and I'll straighten things out…"

Wait and then… "Hank, do you think for a _second_ I have time in the day to watch your potbellied pig? I have my hands full here! In case you don't remember I'm busy being a single father of two with a full time job!" Poopatine flipped the fish as he listened, then replied, "Why did you have the class pet-sitter schedule then? If you're so concerned, leave him with Nancy or Michael. I won't be suckered into this, now send those two home. Dinner is almost ready… Yes, goodbye… I don't _care_ if you'll owe me forever. Consider this revenge for not helping me escape from that cursed hole in the ground when I was after Fanboy and Chum Chum's gum mutant!" He slammed down the phone and quickly finished dinner. "Three, two, one," he counted down aloud.

Right on cue there was the bang of thunder and all at once Kyle and Sigmund appeared in the kitchen. "You've been _dazzled_!" Sigmund's unmistakable voice exclaimed as he bowed low.

"Oh spare us the dramatics," Kyle bit, rolling his eyes.

Poopatine took their plates and turned, handing them to the boys. "Sitting at the table, boys."

"Can ve not sit in ze living room far vunce? Ze season finale of mein show is on," Sigmund replied.

"Oh gag me with a spoon," Kyle said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh very well. I'm curious about it now, what with all that practicing with skyscrapers and all the incidents surrounding the taping," Poopatine agreed.

"I'll be in the kitchen, thank you very much," Kyle remarked. Just then his crystal ball rang and he grabbed it. "Hello?" he asked as he entered the dining room.

"Vell, ze living room?" Sigmund asked.

"So be it," Poopatine replied. He followed the boy in and Sigmund turned on the television.

FBaCC

The show was almost over when Kyle came in and sat next to them looking cross. This was the last place he wanted to be, watching Sigmund the Stupid Show-Off. "How disgusting, flaunting your talents like that. They are a prize, not a toy," Kyle insulted his brother.

"I get paid," Sigmund answered with a shrug.

"And almost killed," Poopatine distastefully said, unimpressed with the way they had pushed the boy for the final take and played up his suffering as if it were the greatest thing on the face of the planet. The episode ended and Poopatine shut the TV off.

"I vould date myself if I could," Sigmund proudly declared.

"Ugh, the very thought of _two_ Sigmund's is almost too much to _bear_," Kyle remarked. Sigmund frowned. He looked to Poopatine and added, "By the way, papa, may I go to Fanboy and Chum Chum's for a slumber party over the weekend? They've invited me with the promise of showing something grand."

"Vhen have zey ever impressed you?" Sigmund asked.

"Once, with a ring trick," Kyle replied.

"Zat had you fooled?" Sigmund incredulously questioned.

"I couldn't remember, okay!" Kyle barked.

"I teethed on zat trick," Sigmund bragged.

"Well so did I!" Kyle defended.

"Boys," Poopatine lowly warned. They fell silent. Finally he replied, "If you keep up with your chores and behave the rest of the week you can go."

"Ooh goody! Thank you sir!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Let's play ein board game," Sigmund suggested.

FBaCC

"I did not cheat," Poopatine teased, tickling the two children who laughed on the floor. He allowed them to attack back, however, tickling him as well.

"You did so!" Kyle exclaimed.

"You are vorse zen Kyle!" Sigmund laughed as the two children roughhoused with their father.

"I'm just that clever," Poopatine replied.

"So you admit it!" Kyle exclaimed excitedly. He'd never roughhoused before. It was fun!

"Never!" Poopatine exclaimed.

"You vill talk!" Sigmund insisted as Poopatine pulled away, laughing and running from them. The two darted after him. Just as the boys were about to attack, however, they heard a loud crash and slid to stops, gasping.

FBaCC

There was silence. Soon Kyle asked, "What was that?"

"I don't know," Poopatine replied, pulling the two close to him and behind, standing protectively in front of them.

"You don't sink…" Sigmund began.

"But why would the tooth fairy and Dr. Acula attack _now_?" Kyle whispered.

"Because we're completely unprepared," Poopatine gravely replied. There was silence. Quietly he murmured, "We have to leave, _now_."

"To vhere?" Sigmund asked.

"Kyle, do you have a secret exit somewhere?" Poopatine asked.

"Of course I do," Kyle replied, insulted he'd think otherwise.

"Where do we go?" Poopatine quietly questioned.

"Follow me," Kyle whispered. Silently the three hugged the wall, quietly sliding along it.

"I hear zem in ze dining room," Sigmund muttered.

"Right across from us. Here's hoping they don't open the door yet," Poopatine replied as they reached the main one. Kyle swallowed and opened it as silently as he could. Quickly the three slipped out. Just then Kyle gasped, freezing. Another vision! Dr. Acula was hanging from the roof of the hall they were in, and he was prepared to attack!

"Father, Sigmund, Dr. Acula's here," Kyle desperately hissed.

Sure enough, right on cue they heard Acula's unmistakable voice say, "Vhy Bloodworth-Thomason's, hello." The three gasped and looked up. He pounced! The three cried out in alarm and dove away.

"There ya are mates," the tooth fairy suddenly said. The three looked up, gasping again. Right above them loomed the figure of the tooth fairy!

"Oh zoot," Sigmund squeaked as the three leapt up and looked both ways at the ones surrounding them.

FBaCC

"Kyle, where do we go!?" Poopatine questioned evenly.

"_Nowhere_ if we can't get away!" Kyle exclaimed. Just then they heard beeping and booping. All at once Dr. Acula was seized by metallic claws! He screamed in fear and pain as whatever had grasped him thrust him powerfully into the tooth fairy! The two fell to the ground crying out, and the family turned.

"Brenda!" Poopatine exclaimed.

"Perfect timing," Sigmund declared, racing to her and leaping on. The other two followed. "Direction Constipator," Sigmund ordered as Brenda shot off. Dr. Acula and the Wizard Tooth Fairy leapt up scowling!

"Around this corner," Kyle answered, pointing ahead.

"After zem! I have my own plans," Acula stated.

"Right mate," the tooth fairy agreed. Instantly he tore after the three humans and the mechanical chair!

"Quickly, he's coming!" Kyle exclaimed as he looked back, holding onto Brenda with one hand.

"She's going as fast as she can," Poopatine assured.

"He's catching up!" Sigmund exclaimed.

"Oh dear," Kyle squeaked. Poopatine looked back worriedly. Unfortunately, right then they tore around the corner and Kyle was sent flying! He cried out in alarm as he flew, then pain when he hit the ground. He rolled into another hallway branching off the main one and gasped in alarm.

"Fazher, Kyle!" Sigmund exclaimed, pointing back. Poopatine looked then gasped. Instantly he stopped Brenda and turned.

"Not again," he muttered as the wizard tooth fairy came around the corner and spotted the two. He moved towards them slowly, but at least, Poopatine realized, Kyle was hidden. Kyle gaped from the shadows and backed farther into the other hall.

"Now I've gotcha," the fairy said. All at once he zapped. Poopatine cried out in alarm, but quickly Sigmund summoned a force field, blocking the blast. The impact was hard, but Poopatine held his boy steady. The fairy shot again but the shield held up. This was wearing thin quickly, however. The shock of the blows was disorienting the sorcerer, _despite_ his father's support!

Kyle gasped, watching his father and brother losing power. He gritted his teeth then leapt out and shot with his wand at the fairy's back. The tooth fairy cried out in pain and spotted Kyle. Well, he couldn't get through the force field, so he would settle. "You! Well now you're gonna pay." With that he ran after Kyle. Kyle turned and darted away, the fairy pursuing.

"Kyle!" Poopatine and Sigmund called after him, but Kyle was gone, the tooth fairy in tow!

"Fazher, vhat do ve do?" Sigmund demanded.

Poopatine gritted his teeth and declared, "Come on! We must catch him!" Instantly the two darted after Kyle and the fairy.

FBaCC

Kyle looked back, panting. The fairy was still behind him! What did he have to do to get _away_? "I've gotcha pest," the fairy stated. He could feel the man's breath on him!

"No!" he cried.

Just then Poopatine shouted, "Kyle, duck!" Kyle obeyed without thinking, and the fairy flew right passed him! Kyle gasped and shot up. Perfect! He looked back at his father and brother and ran in their direction. Just then, however, from the roof dropped Dr. Acula behind them. Neither was aware.

Kyle paled and slid to a stop, screaming, "Look out!"

Alarmed, the two quickly turned. The vampire was biting for Sigmund! Sigmund screamed. Poopatine leapt up, tackling Acula away. Sigmund leapt off of Brenda and shot a fire blast at the creature. Kyle sighed in relief. They could handle Acula. Unfortunately, he forgot one small, actually large, detail. Behind him was the tooth fairy! He heard a growl and spun around, remembering. He screamed in shock as the fairy struck at him with a blast. He screamed in pain as it hit him viciously. All at once the tooth fairy transported them somewhere else in the house! Kyle was glad there was a bit of protection around his home. He couldn't be transported out against his own will. Now, though, there was another problem. He was alone with the Wizard Tooth Fairy, no backup!

FBaCC

Kyle backed away fearfully. "N-now, now, can't we talk this out like civilized people?" Kyle squeaked, grinning innocently.

"I'm gonna enjoy takin' you out. In fact, I won't even _collect_ your teeth. Other methods of pain are just as fun," the fairy growled menacingly.

"Pain? Oh, no thank you. I like my come-up-ins served to me pain free," Kyle nervously replied.

"We don't do special orders here, kid," the tooth fairy replied. Kyle whipped out his wand and shot, but the tooth fairy easily parried it. He shot in return. Desperately Kyle dove to the side. He was shot at again and again. How could he fight back if he couldn't get a blast in?! Poopatine was right, he should have been practicing his reflexes. Maybe then this would be easier.

FBaCC

Poopatine and Sigmund attacked Acula together. The vampire shrieked and morphed into a bat. Quickly he flew away from them. He couldn't win this round! Sigmund suddenly appeared in front of him and conjured up a wooden stake! Dracula shrieked and dove as Sigmund stabbed. Poopatine grabbed the stake and leapt at the bat, bringing him down. Viciously he raised it, ready to strike, but before he could Acula exclaimed, "If you kill me, you von't see your youngest again!"

Poopatine froze and gasped. He shot instantly up, looking around. Acula was right! Kyle was nowhere to be seen! "Kyle, where's Kyle?" Poopatine asked Sigmund urgently.

"I don't know," Sigmund answered, just as surprised. They heard a poof and looked to where Acula had been. He was flying away!

"Don't forget your checkups tomorrow!" the vampire called back.

"Oh yes, I forgot about those. Better pen that in when I get the chance," Poopatine remarked. Sigmund looked at him in horrified disbelief. The man had just tried to murder them all, they'd been fighting a series of epic battles against him, and now they were all doctor-patient again? "What? On the clock he's bound to professional rules," Poopatine defended. "Besides, he's the only good doctor in town." Sigmund looked at the floor, unconvinced. A message was carved into it reading: _I'll be back._ The two looked at each other fearfully, remembering Kyle. Instantly they separated to try and find him.


	9. Threat Terminated

_**Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths**_

(A/N: Third up today, final chapter. Enjoy. Thank you to my reviewers past, present, and future.)

Threat Terminated

Kyle hit the ground panting. He couldn't keep this up! Weakly he looked over at the tooth fairy. How many times had he been blasted now? He'd lost count, but he felt so weak. He was in so much pain. He coughed weakly and tried to stagger up. "You're done for kid," the fairy growled. He shot again and Kyle screamed in agony. He sobbed and tried to break free, but to no avail. He felt like he was dying. Wait a minute… That was because he _was_! He burst into tears. Oh immortals, he didn't want to die!

"Papa, Sigmund!" he screamed desperately.

"Kyle!" a voice called out. Sigmund. The Tooth Fairy gasped. If the boy was alive, Acula had failed. He couldn't take them all on at _once_!

"Sigmund, help me!" Kyle shrieked again. The tooth fairy scowled. He wasn't sticking around to deal with this. He intensified the blast. Kyle screamed in pain and the fairy shot him towards the staircase! Kyle rolled down them head first! The tooth fairy heard footsteps and gasped. Acula had failed, yes, but at least _he'd_ dealt with one of them. Maybe one day they would have the other two, but not now. The boy didn't know it, but his blasts had been powerful and weakened the tooth fairy something fierce. Immediately he poofed away. He wouldn't have been able to take on the janitor and sorcerer alone.

FBaCC

Sigmund raced around the corner in time to see the fairy poof away. But where was Kyle? "Kyle?!" Sigmund called. No reply. Sigmund gasped. What if the fairy had taken him! "Kyle!" he shouted again. Just then he heard a groan. He gasped and looked towards the staircase. Oh no… He raced towards them and looked down. There, at the bottom, lay Kyle's still body! "Kyle!" he called, instantly racing down. The wizard was hurt. Badly hurt. He was bleeding and he bet there was more to it than just that. He slid to a halt beside the body and knelt, turning Kyle over. Not that he had any affection for his rival at all, but still. If anyone would take out the Conjurer it would be _him_. No mythical creatures were taking that victory from him…!

"Sigmund," Kyle hoarsely whispered.

"Kyle, Kyle, do not give out yet," Sigmund ordered angrily. Oh if he gave up he'd be very unhappy about it.

Kyle blinked up at his brother, eyes frightened. He didn't want to die! "Sigmund?" he meekly squeaked.

"Conjurer, do not give out now. I have not finished vith you," Sigmund pled, instantly seeing death ascending. He was fading and fast!

"I-I believe th-that's the first time you've _ever_ called me by my proper title. Unfortunately, probably the last as well," Kyle weakly said, rolling his eyes.

"Fazher, fazher, I have found him! Kyle iz hurt! Fazher, hurry!" Sigmund called desperately, alarmed.

"Kyle, Sigmund!" Poopatine called. They heard footsteps, but Kyle's eyes were closing.

"Kyle, stay avake! Or vill I have to show you up yet again?" Sigmund demanded, hoping the challenge would help him stay alive.

FBaCC

Poopatine raced to the staircase and darted down. He gasped, sliding to a stop on seeing the youngest lying still in his brother's arms, raggedly breathing. "Kyle!" he exclaimed, falling to his knees next to the boy.

"Fazher, vhat do ve do?" Sigmund demanded.

"We do what we can and hope that if it doesn't work the regeneration spell will spare him," Poopatine solemnly replied. "Kyle, look at me. Son, don't close your eyes," Poopatine said.

Kyle's eyes fluttered hopefully open. "D-daddy?" he stammered.

"Yes, Kyle, yes, daddy's here," Poopatine promised.

"I-I don't want to die," Kyle whimpered.

"You von't, if I know you," Sigmund unconcernedly said. At least he tried to make it sound unconcerned. "You vill not give me ze satisfaction." Poopatine subtly nodded, signalling Sigmund to continue challenging him and playing on their rivalry. "You vunce even said zat you could not survive me showing you up again. Not zat it matters now, uf course, seeing zat you vill die anyvay. Pathetic, as alvays," Sigmund continued, taking the cue. Poopatine was relieved to see Kyle's eyes hardening, his jaw clenching. He was finding the will to fight for life just as he was about to topple into the black abyss of death.

"Oh _will_ I now?!" Kyle shot. He cried out in pain, though, and gasped, falling back and gasping for breath, shivering.

"Wait! Easy, Kyle," Poopatine shot, holding the boy's head up.

"Veak, as alvays," Sigmund said, unimpressed.

"I'll show you who's weak!" Kyle hissed viciously.

"I am still vaiting, little brozher," Sigmund replied.

"You're insufferable," Kyle nipped, snuggling closer to the janitor, trying to fight off the pain and blackness he felt was coming. He couldn't let Sigmund win! He wouldn't give the sorcerer the satisfaction.

FBaCC

All at once a blue light began to surround him. "Vat?" Sigmund questioned, confused.

"He's activating the regeneration spell early," Poopatine replied in surprise. "He's healing himself with the spell that's already been cast."

"How vould _you_ know?" Sigmund questioned.

"What else could it be?" Poopatine questioned, frowing. Would they just drop the questions already?

"I won't give you the satisfaction of watching me die!" Kyle shot suddenly in a burst of strength. Viciously he turned to face Sigmund.

"I am seeing zat," Sigmund replied in awe as the spell lifted Kyle into the air.

"I will survive, as always, so in your face Sigmund!" Kyle shot angrily. "I've gone through a lot worse."

"Keep on going Kyle," Sigmund replied, grinning now.

"I'm done, thank you!" Kyle shot. Just then the spell dropped him onto his feet. "Ooh, headache," Kyle said, wavering dizzily.

"You're alive!" Sigmund exclaimed, suddenly hugging him tightly.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Now I vill still have ze chance to destroy und belittle you!" Sigmund exclaimed. "I have never been comfortable vith ze thought uf you being happy."

"Jerk!" Kyle shouted furiously.

"Amateur," Sigmund replied.

"Why you no good…" Kyle began. Just then, though, Poopatine hugged both boys tightly, cutting off their argument. They relented and held him back. Finally they were safe from their insane pursuers. Not that they probably wouldn't be back, but at least not for a while more. Until then, they were fine. Weren't they?


End file.
